The begining

[written July 2nd 2010]

Where, oh where to be begin.

I have struggled with my weight since i was a kid. I was always teased for being bigger then everyone else (didn't help that i developed early too - i was wearing a B cup by grade 7)

In the last 10 years i have tried every diet imaginable.
South beach, weight watchers, la weight loss... you name it.
and last year with out much success i even shelled out a ton of money to try the Dr Bernstein Diet. Man that is expensive and time consuming.

I had pretty much the same success with all of the diets i tried. I could loose 30lbs but then i would get off track and gain more back.

In December I had a bad break up with my fiance (i won't get into details here - other then to say he in an idiot), and since i am an emotional eater, my current diet went out the window and i gained even more weight. So here i stand at 27 being the heaviest i have ever been.

In February i approached my family doctor on her opinion on a lab band surgery. It had been on my mind prior to my break up but got pushed to the back till then.

She was completely supportive of the procedure and immediately sent off the requisitions for the tests i would need before i talked with a surgeon. (the surgeon wouldn't see me unless i passed the test to make me a viable candidate). She let me know that she had another patient that had had the surgery last year and is very happy with it (no names - she didn't break confidentiality). She also let me know the approximate cost i was looking at, as the lap-band is not covered my my provincial health care.

I had a major pause at the cost. She gave me the quote her other patient had received when she had the procedure and it was a lot. Since my doctor knows that money doesn't grow on trees for me this is probably why she never suggested the surgery to me before - i really couldn't afford it.

After taking some preliminary tests, and going to the bank to see if i qualified for a loan. i kinda put it in perspective. what is my health worth? what other health problems will i develop if i don't loose weight?

i passed the preliminary tests and saw my surgeon.

I am booked for surgery on the 12th of July.

while i am sure this is the best avenue for me. i am still worried - it is surgery after all.

forgive me

Forgive me if my blog is disjointed or at times doesn't make much sence - this is my very first attempt at blog.